However, yes, there is an however, or but, and a by the way.....
I am tired of hearing people who are fortunate enough to have children at the snap of a finger tell myself, and people like me, that pregnancy is easy. They say "It will happen when it happens", or "It's not that hard". Unfortunately, getting pregnant isn't easy for me, some of my cousins, many of my friends, and many more people that I have not met. Do people mean to sound annoying and obnoxious? No! But can it feel like a stab in the heart? Yes.
Like myself, many women have PCOS, otherwise known as Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome which makes it hard for the body to ovulate.
Many women have horrible Endometriosis.
Many women have Unexplained Infertility.
Many struggle with Hydrosalpinx too.
There are even men who are infertile.
Sometimes age plays a huge factor.
I know there are several more reasons out there too.
It is hard. Emotionally. Mentally.
It is hard on a marriage.
There are ways to try and help, but that doesn't guarantee that it will work. There are pills you can take, shots you can mix and inject, there are suppositories to use, and there are procedures that you can do. Timed Intercourse, IUI (Intrauterine Insemination), and IVF (In Vitro Fertilization). Health Insurance doesn't cover any of it either.
Have you heard of a nasty little pill called Clomid? It isn't fun. You cry, you yell, you throw shakes on people, you stress, and you get sick. However, it helps your body to ovulate. Your love life is charted and is timed. You take shots in your stomach, and suppositories each night. You do this until you hear if your pregnancy test is positive or negative. If is negative, you start all over. If it is positive, well, congratulations!
You can only take Clomid 6 months out of the year, it is also known as 6 cycles.
Of course there are other medicines out there, but I do not know what they do, or how they help.
I wish I knew, then maybe I wouldn't be crying on the floor because I am out of my favorite soup.
I am so happy when I find out friends and family are pregnant. Their life is off to a great new adventure.
Please don't think that hearing news like that is heart breaking, because it's not.
Please just understand, others are more fortunate when it comes to starting families. That is perfectly fine.
Just be careful for what you say, or at least how you say it.
Please don't ask when we will have children, because I can't tell you an answer to that.
Those of you that are expecting, congratulations! Best of luck, and may God bless you in your amazing journey!
Thank you for sharing so candidly. Though it has been two decades since I tried to have a baby, the pain came back fresh as I read your post. Interestingly, I still have people hurt me with this. They say," I know exactly how you feel. It took me a while to get pregnant." They do not know how I feel because they eventually did have a baby. I love my children (both adopted). Adoption cured my parentlessness but it did not cure my infertility. Still something I must live with and work through years and years later. I think you are handling it beautifully. Tell people what a helpful response sounds like. Tell people when they are being inappropriate. And this encouragement I will give you...as the years pass...the pain is less sharp, less consuming.
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